Is Giving My Baby Up For Adoption The Right Choice?
Every woman who considers an adoption plan for her child has many questions that need to be answered. She is also facing a range of emotions as she weighs her choices. The Adoption Alliance provides guidance for women facing this difficult decision. Our goal is to assist you in making the decision that is right for you.
The Adoption Alliance, as a licensed adoption agency in Texas, can provide birth mothers who choose adoption with financial assistance and support services, all at no cost to the birth mother.
The Adoption Alliance seeks to help each birth mother not just with an adoption plan, but with an overall life plan. Our hope is that the experience will be one of learning, growth, giving, and, perhaps, a fresh start.
5 Questions To Ask Yourself Before Placing Your Baby For Adoption
- Will I be able to provide for my child financially?
- Would I have to depend on my parents or friends to take over for me?
- Can I parent a child and still meet my own needs? Finish school? Start a career?
- Do I understand the daily demands of childcare?
- Can I work all day to afford childcare, rent, groceries, etc. and adequately raise my child?
You may be excited one day, confused and tearful the next. All of these emotions will come together appropriately in time. However, an unplanned pregnancy is not the end of the world for you. Thousands of young women have come through their pregnancies wiser, more mature, more responsible and more compassionate. Although in many cases adoption was not their first choice, they have faced it courageously and grown tremendously. They have gone on to lead happy, productive, meaningful lives and you will too.
What Is Baby Adoption In Texas…
Adoption is an unselfish gift of love from you to your child and to the adoptive parents you choose. However, you may be experiencing many emotional ups and downs and you may have many questions about adoption. People may assume or expect that because you are pregnant you will want to parent your child or abort the pregnancy but adoption is another option for you and your child.
Adoption is not about giving away your baby. Adoption is a parenting decision…
Remember you are making a plan for your child’s future. Your baby deserves a stable home where he/she will be provided all of the emotional and financial support necessary to have a bright, happy future.
Adoption is another loving solution to an unplanned pregnancy.
If a woman is not prepared to parent, an adoption plan may be the most desirable plan for her and the child as well as the answer to another family’s prayers.
Adoption is permanent, but it does not mean goodbye forever.
A birth mother cannot sign her relinquishment documents until the child is 48 hours old. Once the relinquishment documents are signed the decision to place the child for adoption is permanent. However, birth parents may decide to receive photographs and letters from the adoptive family for a period of time.
Adoption is a decision you make for yourself and your child.
Whether you decide to raise or place a child for adoption, the decision will be one that will affect you for the rest of your life. Taking responsibility for a new life is can be an amazing experience, however it is okay to consider what is best for you…like finishing school or continuing your career. Remember, you have choices! Give yourself time. Know that it is normal to feel overwhelmed or confused, but with thoughtful consideration and guidance, you will make the right choice for you and your child.
3 Facts About Giving Up Your Child For Adoption In Texas
Fact # 1: All parents, regardless of whether or not they are thinking about adoption, love their child (ren). Placing a child for adoption does not change that.
“When I was leaving the hospital, I honestly would have traded everything I ever had to keep him. What kept me going was the thought that I was doing all of this for him. This was best for him.”
— Mary, age 22
“The family I had chosen flew in the night I called to tell them I was having the baby. They walked into my room and I will never forget the look on their faces when I met them. I don’t think I have ever seen so much joy in a person’s face as I did the morning I walked them to the nursery to meet their new baby boy. I am now 33 years old. I have a beautiful sixteen year old son and yes, in my heart of hearts, another son out there who is almost thirteen now. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about him…. thanks for helping me give him a great life.”
— Lisha, age 33
Perhaps you are afraid of what others will think you of you for considering adoption. If you are having these thoughts, consider the following:
- Speak with another birthmother who has been through an adoption.
- Surround yourself with people who respect you, your decision and your ability to consider what is best for you and your child.
- You know you love your child! Your serious consideration of all of your options, demonstrates your love and devotion.
Fact #2: A birth parent determines her level of involvement with her child.
- You may select the adoptive family from photo albums filled with pictures and profiles of approved families waiting to adopt.
- You can meet the adoptive family, gather information about them and you may get to know them before your child is born.
- You may spend time with your child at the hospital following the delivery.
- The adoptive parents will send photos and progress reports to the agency, which can be forwarded to you. You may send a gift and write letters to your child and the adoptive family.
- You can allow the adoptive parents to share the birth with you at the hospital.
Fact #3: You will always remember and love your child.
If you make an adoption plan for your child, you will never forget or want to forget your child. What you will want to do is to continue with your life and not be crippled by your loss. You will want to remember your pregnancy, the birth and those precious hours you shared with your child. In your memories, you want to feel that you made the most loving, mature and unselfish decision you could possibly have made for your child. For you to remember your child in a positive way also allows you to grieve.
- Talk openly about the adoption with your counselor, family members or friends who will support you emotionally.
- If you want to spend some time with your child before you leave the hospital, do so. If you do not want to see the child, this will be respected.
- Realize that your body has gone through a tremendous experience and give yourself time to heal. Your body will be physically exhausted and you will be emotionally drained as well.
Next Steps If You Are Considering Adoption In Texas
Now that you have learned more about giving up your child for adoption in Texas, it’s important to remember the following:
- Talk about all of the issues with your adoption counselor.
- Go through the worksheets your counselor will provide to you.
- Browse our list of frequently asked questions about adoption.
Keep an open mind as you consider all of your alternatives. You must make an informed decision…for you and your child.